How would the media depict us as gun owners?

(Disclaimer; none of the events described are real. This is all fiction and theory. And nor do I intend to advocate breaking the law.)
Now, let's say that I get arrested, and, (play the trumpet), the American mainstream media circus gets involved. Now, this is my parody to "Firearms & Media Bias (Arsenal Owners)". And no, I probably would NOT own most of the weapons described (the arsenal I plan to build would be quite different), nor would we hold the types of weapons described (we would be much better equipped than that). Now, here we go;
Hi, this is tonight's breaking news, with Chad McSheer. Today, in Texas, the private bus that Kriss Ite was riding has been pulled over, with its passengers, and the passengers will be extradited to multiple countries to face charges for the World's people against Democide terror gang's bribing of firearms authority officers in multiple countries such as the Netherlands, Germany, United Kingdom, Indonesia, Japan, China, Vietnam, India, Chile, South Africa, and many others to make it easier for people outside of the military and police to obtain guns. When he was pulled over, FBI agents got extra suspicious when he started to act belligerently.

Translation; I made the not-so-smart choice to have agents and regional commanders try to bribe firearms authority people and law enforcement to issue firearms licenses to people in places where "May issue" or hard to get licenses were required to legally obtain firearms and/or certain weapons. (Just to let you know, of course, I probably won't do it in real life.) I also asked why did they pull me over.

After pulling out all of the riders and disarming the guards, FBI agents searched the bus, which had extremist, conspiracy theorist and anti semitic imagery and symbolism. The guards were dressed in paramilitary uniforms, wearing heavy ballistic vests, and were heavily armed. Inside the bus, not only did the riders have backpacks with large amounts of food, water, and explosives, along with assault rifles and powerful yet unregulated rifles capable of obliterating bulletproof vests.

Translation; the bus we had was actually a fullsize van (ie GMC Savana 3500). It had bumper stickers that were pro-right to self defense and keep and bear arms, supported Ron Paul, Jesse Ventura and Alex Jones, and denounced the Israeli foreign lobby. The 2 Security officers were wearing stab vests and had expandable batons. The group also just got back from tin-can and antique black powder shoot. The weapons we possessed were "tactical" semi automatic .22 rimfires along with antique single-shot blackpowder rifles.

Soon, a warrant was issued to search a part of a micronation confederation known as the "Freeland" confederation. After a surrender to National Guard troops, one of these bases were searched. In it, there were enormous stockpiles of rapid firing assault rifles, extremely high power caliber rifles, a sizeable amount of chemicals for explosives and information needed to build them, heavy body armor, pepper spray, tasers, various bladed weapons and enough food to last for several years.

Translation; same as the bus, except that they also found molle vests, regular household and work-grade (ie construction) chemicals, internet connection, a bunch of knives, hot sauce put in spray bottles (so security personnel can deal with unruly individuals) and a handful of Earthquake rations.

When we spoke with individuals who knew Kriss Ite, he was described as a quiet guy who kept to himself, and didn't engage much with people especially outside of the micronation confederation. He was also known to frequent gun shops and forums for gun fanatics, conspiracy theorists, anti-semitic and anti government extremists.

Translation; I have autism and aspergers (I may not always seek other people anyway and they'll probably leave it out), I am into weaponry, political truth, disagree with and expose Israel's current government, and I want to unite the TEA party and "Occupy" movements (though I don't consider myself a member). And in reality, I do NOT hate on the entire Jewish people, not do I agree with the views of all of the source people I listen to.

So I think I can speak for everyone that we're all glad that this guy is now under control of the governments that seek to protect us from these radicals.

The end.

Note; Chad McSheer makes an appearance in several "Conrad the Constitution" episodes, such as "Conrad the Constitution S3 Ep4 - Conrad Goes Missing".

So what do you think of this? Please leave your opinion in the comments below.

If this was to happen in real life...
The bus would be a Thomas C2 or some type of Intercity/Commuter long-haul coach (bumper stickers would be the same). The armed security officers would be wearing military gear (ie body armor, helmet) with either a dark blue or urban camouflage uniform. The weapons that, in areas that are legal, that we may posses would be seen on https://www.pinterest.com/StopDemocide/custom-weapon-ideas/ and https://www.pinterest.com/StopDemocide/my-firearm-wish-list/ .